A year ago I would have been so proud of the picture above. Now it's well down in the list of my pictures I think are good - there's that slide show of mine which resulted in the most wonderful feedback and it won't be in there. Then it struck me. I'm trying to be a perfectionist. The picture isn't so bad after all!
The odd thing is that I don't think I've ever tried to be a perfectionist until the last two months. In that time I've been told that I'm facing redundancy and the most important person in my life has cancer. I can't put two and two together and make four, I think I make it five or three or perhaps two-and-a-half. There are just too many things going on right now for me to make sense of them. Tonight, a close friend and colleague lost his father. Too many bad things are happening at once. Keera, another friend, is also facing a difficult time. Hopefully things will even out soon and those I care about will be around to tell stories of their eventual success. I know Pam will be and I'll be there to make sure it happens.
The moral of the story? I'm not sure I have one and even if I do, I'm not of the right mind to comprehend it. Perhaps in a few months or so when I can post something about the treat lady (Pam) arriving back in Hawaii I'll have a better idea of what I want to say. I hope so because even I can't make sense of what I'm writing, I just need to write it.
Pam gets her pathology report tomorrow (Tues 2nd) and she's scared and nervous. So am I.
Oh, it's the shadow of Mauna Kea with a sort of anticrepuscular ray combined with the earth's shadow and the eastern flank of the mountain with its cinder cones. It was taken on Sunday evening so too late for the slide show anyway!